reactions as daily reality
The surprising fact
is, that even a person with enough knowledge and who has a lot of insights,
can react and is been drawn into emotional reactions like a 5 years old
child or behaving like when it happened in the time when the initial reaction
had happened and had caused a 'trauma', that means that there was
established a memory structure that then in the future worked like an unconscious
mirror, causing automatic reactions. Obviously these past situations need
to be repeated again and again: In dreams or in daily happenings and so
whatever shows up in daily life, the situations are interpreted that it
gives the opportunity to be able to react. Of course with the usual attitude
to give the fault to the outside and to other people. They might have caused
the reaction, but were provoked in their insensitive and hurting behavior
in the first place to be able to react, to repeat the old trauma... and
as other people have similar needs, so it produces a common game and a
That makes the interaction,
the communication and the living together of people so difficult and a
lot of energy goes into those emotional reactions and then causes all those
arguing, the withdrawing etc. and might then cause a chain reaction of
reactions on all sides.
There is no logic
and no objectivity and talking is hardly possible. Nobody feels understood
and even common high pitched goals are going down the river, because nothing
seems to make sense. Pretty sad, but that is our daily reality... So what
can we do? How can we deal with this?
Is there a way out
of the straight jacket of our 'Personality' that is acting and reacting
mostly out of ones unconscious background, with the follow-up of suffering,
disappointment and desperation? Who is ready might find in the following
How did you come to the subject Human Nature and what is the importance
to know about Survival Techniques?
thirty years of trying to form an Intentional Community, I have learned
a lot about survival techniques people are using and in connection with
this about human nature. After so many years being involved in it, I'm
still often surprised about the many ways people are adapting themselves
to different survival techniques, that are mostly quite primitive and not
so different than used from plants and animals.
Plants have developed
beautiful flowers with the purpose to attract insects, then giving some
honey as reward for being fertilized. So in this exchange one is serving
Then there are plants
that pretend to offer honey with a flower, but if the insect enters the
promising fountain, then gets eaten by the plant. With animals it is even
clearer: One is eating the other, which is called 'alimentation chain'.
Animals have developed sophisticated techniques to trap other animals and
not only using mostly their strength. They are pretending and promising
with the only purpose to get what they want. Are humans different?
Obviously not, humans
are pretending and lying whenever this serves to get what they want. Like
animals they are not conscious about it and the phenomena is that people
mostly believe in their own lies and that makes these so convincing. A
salesman who doesn't believe in the usefulness of the thing he wants to
sell, because he knows that it is rubbish, will not sell much even he might
be a good actor and had a sophisticated sales training; people feel that
he is not convincing even if he is using all kind of psychological tricks
and so some will reject his offer.
Humans like all alive
beings have the inbuilt urge to survive and so they use the same techniques
as from the beginning of their appearance: they lie and pretend to get
what they want or they use just plain strength, because they are convinced
that they need certain conditions or things to survive, then using the
same basic ways of all more or less primitive creatures.
Meanwhile during evolution
of mankind there were established rules and moral codes, but these doesn't
disturb too much as the survival techniques are mostly unconscious, although
developed with sophisticated strategies.
Modern salesmen don't
care about moral and they are using the same primitive techniques, being
aware of their fake promises and techniques, pushing the right buttons
to trigger desire, so that their products or services will be bought. Or
in a private surrounding similar manipulations are used to get what one
People like sheep
follow the false pastor, because they are without direction and don't know
what they really want and they let themselves be manipulated by others,
then not needing to decide out of their own responsibility. There are so
many games are going on like individuals and one supports the other...
So how can one get out of all those games? And why should one get out of
can't get out. Even trying hard, one only will turn around oneself. This
is the present state of evolution of consciousness of humanity and to go
beyond this condition is extremely difficult. You seriously want to know
how to get out? Then study human nature and be aware of your conditioning.
Find out from where your conditionings are coming from and how much this
is motivating and provoking your reactions in your daily life situations.
Become aware that
you are programmed and identified with all those influences that you have
made to your properties, being well established due to your identification
Become aware that
you are still acting and reacting out of primitive survival needs, even
though you have upgraded those with sophisticated new philosophies. Do
you have the need to get out of your games? You are so used to it and it
gives you the feeling of existence. It doesn't really matter if you enjoy
something or if you are suffering, - important is for you that you feel
your existence. The tragically aspect is that you need all kind of media,
you are not capable to just be aware of your existence, between a possible
experience of your pure existence stands your personality and as
you are totally identified with it, there is not yet a real urge to get
out of ones personality games, otherwise you would need to go beyond and
this goes against nature that in the first place is defending the established
form and structure, even if it is a trap or straight jacket.
You mean my personality is influenced by all what I have received from
my surrounding during my life?
only your personality is 'influenced', - your personality exist
mainly because you are identified with those concepts and your self image
that has built up through all those influences. The personality is reacting
like a mirror that holds those stored pictures and the stories connected
with those images, forming ones 'self image'. The world and every thing
in it are seen through the glasses of these pictures and reality is filtered
and interpreted through this filter. There is no freedom; people are stuck
in a straight jacket made out of their picture-world-personality. Humans
are conceptual beings, they are not capable to relate and respond directly
to reality how it shows up in daily life.
As far I understand, you are saying that we only respond to what comes
to us out of our established background structure, that is mostly unconscious
and so we are reacting more like zombies because we are not aware of ourselves
and our background.
Exactly! You got it right.
Where the need to survive is coming from?
a system is built up and this is valid for all kind of systems: Plants,
animals, humans, organizations, groups, corporations, countries and even
planets and solar systems.
All systems have the
inbuilt tendency to defend themselves to hold the form together and the
technique depends on the position and condition of the system. Mostly the
strength and flexibility determents the defense method. They all have one
thing in common: They turn around themselves!
Plants defend themselves
mostly in a passive way by developing poison, sharp thorns or a bitter
taste. Animals defend themselves with aggression or the ability to camouflage
and hide or escape faster than an attacker can.
Humans as more sophisticated
beings are using all these abilities and as being the 'crown of evolution'
further developed methods. As their mental and emotional abilities have
grown, so they use these to defend themselves in their established personality
in the most sophisticated way. So they are nearly perfect in using their
intellect to manipulate others, lying and pretending is part of it and
as well using provocation to trigger certain emotions to have the result
for ones purpose.
You are talking about modern business methods?
only business methods, this is also the way normal people try to handle
daily life and get what they want, although these methods are mostly unconscious
as these are a heritage from the beginning in human evolution and before...
Well, that's how life functions and indeed daily life shows that there
is a lot of fake going on and people are manipulated in a very tricky way.
Probably this has to do with selection. The strongest and most clever
individual survives, using or eating the others... This is nature, what's
wrong with it?
this is probably the way evolution works. Wrong is just the result, as
the strongest are growing to such an extend that they are swallowing all
and every thing, what might guide to total destruction of humanity.
The serious problem seems to be that we are not conscious about all these.
We are struggling and suffering to find happiness but are getting deeper
into misery, desperation, stress and disease. Modern medicine doesn't help
except cutting some symptoms and all philosophies and psychological techniques
seem to add just more games to keep people busy and turning around oneself
as you say, but not really bringing them out of their vicious cycle. Is
there no effective way to get out of ones personality trap?
there is and always has been. The key is self knowledge, although this
is mostly misunderstood and just interpreted as self confirmation, that
means confirming ones established concepts and self-image. If one wants
to get to know oneself one needs to be critical and question oneself and
anything that shows up and that's then like questioning ones own existence.
That would weaken ones position and that is against the bewaring and defending
of ones system. that is natural and inbuilt in all systems.
But to grow one needs to leave the old behind and even go into unknown
fields, right? Answer: Indeed,
to grow one needs to 'die', at least in parts that are worn out. The dilemma
is that even things are worn out, people hold on to these and don't want
to let go. They are only willing to put new layers on top of the old, like
being open to receive new more sophisticated concepts to integrate them
into old ones, but always reinforcing ones self image, that what you belief
So then what are we really?
I would tell you, then you would reject it or if it fits into your already
established concepts, then you would welcome it and make a new concept
out of it. So I will not tell you, just so much: You need to find out yourself
by questioning yourself, being critical about anything that comes to you
from inside and outside, getting to know about human nature and so understanding
yourself and the way you act and react. Becoming aware of your dependencies
by observing your behavior and reactions in daily life when being confronted
with all kind of situations and people.
This seems to be another key to get out of ones stuck condition.
ones reactions are the key to find out about ones unconscious background
on that one is reacting in a programmed way. This background structure
is invisible and so called 'unconscious' but it becomes visible
through ones reactions. Once visible, one can realize this hidden structure
and also see where these come from and then decide if one wants to hold
on - or let go of them. So clearing up ones background and getting rid
of worn out parts of ones personality.
This is what modern psychology is trying to do in cases when there is too
much disturbance and the individual is not able to adapt oneself to society.
Then people go into psycho analyze or group therapies. This is a long process,
cost a lot of money and eventually is causing more disturbance because
of resistance and imbalance. What you say is that life is the best teacher
if we can have the trust that whatever comes to us, is the best and most
necessary in this moment for ones growing. Right?
once this step is made and one has trust in oneself and knows that there
is sense in what shows up, then we can relate to it and respond without
fear or the need to defend oneself and then there can start a relationship
with life that can be creative and joyful. One will get out of the vicious
cycle that is causing so much stress with disease and suffering as a follow
By the way: There
is a simple exercise that is very beneficial if one is ready and wants
to get out of ones limiting structure, it is called Stress
Release Exercise, that indeed is a helpful key! The advice how to do
it is given for free, no money involved and not any kind of ideology or
One thing more: Why stress is accumulating and then causing so much suffering
like depressions and all kind of disease?
is caused because of the discrepancy between the established self-image
in which all the concepts about every thing and all are integrated and
the reality and this fact shows up in our daily life. Things are not like
they 'should be' and one wants them when they are encountered. There
is no real relating and responding, reality is not recognized, it is suppressed
by not looking at it, ignoring it or reacting in a defensive way like with
anger, these are not creative responses. With these defense reactions real
growing is inhibit! All defense and holding back is causing stress that
could be released by accepting what is there, but acceptance is only possible
when ones self-image becomes more flexible and there is self trust growing...
Look around: Every
thing is expending into new dimensions and even a weak little plant will
break the pot in which it is growing when the pressure of not having enough
space becomes too strong. So if your precious-lousy personality becomes
too small and rigid, holding on its limited form, then the growing force,
that is inbuilt in all being, will eventually break your limitations up
and let you out of your straight jacket, - if you are finally ready for
it and allow that it happens, maybe by doing a step beside your personality
by becoming an observer and not totally being sucked by happenings and
your own reactions. All in its time and when you have - beside the stress,
- have enough motivation accumulated ...